Published on July 12th, 2011 | by Charlie0
First-Time Sex With A New Flame
We’re not talking about a gang-land ritual here, but that all-important skill of being able to initiate sex smoothly and effortlessly, without being either a) drunk or b) so nervous you spill your drink. The key to good sex is a confident entry (so to speak), so why wait for Mr Date #3 to do all the work? If you want sex to happen, take control early on.
Chances are that you both know sex is on the table (again, this is a figure of speech, but let’s not rule anything out) but this doesn’t mean that you should rip each other’s clothes off the minute you get in the door. Frantic, rushed sex can be hot but in terms of keeping control of the situation and working your sex-goddess magic, it’s best to lead the pace yourself. Settle in close to him on the couch or bed and ask him some mildly suggestive questions, maintaining eye contact and lots of touching. Once things start to get more physical, keep a little something back. Tease a little, taking your clothes off slowly. Make sure you let him know that he’s in for an experience he’ll never forget (note: don’t actually SAY this–we’re talking actions not words here) and hey presto–you’ve established the flow of the night.
Something that a lot of women experience the first time they have sex in a new relationship is that they feel more inhibited than usual. It’s normal to be nervous, but it’s also important to let your real sexual personality shine through. Don’t try to cultivate a sexual persona that doesn’t fit–if you like to get a little kinky then embrace that, don’t try to hide it–it’s better to know sooner rather than later if your appetites are going to match. If you usually like to include vibrators or other adult toys in your sex sessions, then don’t hold back–suggest it to your new lover and see how he reacts. We’re betting he’ll be only to keen to oblige…
His after-sex etiquette is as much an indication of the state of affairs as the sex itself. If you both feel comfortable and close after the sex, chances are that you’ve got a good thing going on!